A new survey from the Pew Research Center found that on average, Americans said that the best age to get married is 26.5, the best age to have a kid is 27.3, the best age to buy a home is 28.8 and the best age to retire is 61.8. While not included in the survey, I can indeed confirm that the best age to delusionally answer a survey is “whenever these people took it,” the best age to have your first global recession is “probably not 19,” the best age to have your second global recession is “probably not 30” and the best age to buy a home is “probably a weekend during fight night at the Bellagio when the state of Nevada requires them to have enough funds in the vault to back up every chip on the casino floor, which is the only time that me and ten friends are gonna be able do what it takes to scrape together a down payment in this economy.”
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